The D!rtY P!(turE

Few weeks before I heard that Supreme Court may come up with a legislation which would make watching PORN a non bail-able offence. This news got my blood boiling and my testosterone up (because of anger and in a completely different way from how pornography does it). 

Now, obviously protesting against it in public or putting angry statuses on social networking sites isn’t feasible as anything someone would say in support of Kim Kardashian’s previous area of employment, would result in you being labeled as a vile and depraved person. So, as people already put me into that category, I thought of being the one to broach on this Grave Situation at Hand. 

In my view, the origin of pornography dates back to the time when man had learnt how to make cave drawings. Well, obviously I don’t have any documented proof of this but being a guy myself I seriously know the fickle minded nature of my type, so this is obviously possible so censoring it would result it in breaking an age old tradition of entertainment. But unlike those panelists who debate endlessly on that television news channels, my arguments are not based on constitutional provisions, or how the politicians of our country are making this act as a scapegoat for all those hell lot of scams and the rising cases of rape epidemic. For me no pornography means no more mind boggling story-lines that our Bollywood directors and script-writers could ever come up with.

Now let me explain how exactly the porn universe is different from our usual scientific universe, mind this is for all those jerks who boast their incompetency by swearing aloud that they have never watched porn in their whole life and not for those who watch these small films not for the depraved acts depicted but for the wonderfully terrible acting involved before its gets nasty and naughty.

For example, in our world if any pizza delivery guy mixes up our order, we either abuse the living daylights out of him or end up getting a pizza for free. But this is exactly what not happens in the porniverse, there the pizza delivery boy- who will invariably be 6ft. 5in. tall with physique like a bodybuilder (yeah even in porn movies you need a damn good physique)-will request the customer- who unfailingly will be a lone sexy women in a large mansion and draped in a towel (arousing the pizza delivery guy to his limit), coming from a bath or be going to it- to somehow forgive him. And her solution? Well, just try and recollect Nike’s tagline (JUST DO IT) and you’d figure out the rest.

Only in India it’s possible to refer an ex-porn star as a dedicated actress, a rape victim labeled as morally unsound, and not happening of child marriages as a reason of rising rape cases. So as a solution politicians think of banning internet pornography that’s breeding rapists. WOW, I would ode to my politicians whose mentality I think even sicker than that of a public toilet of Old-Delhi. 

That’s why I desperately want censoring of porn itself should be banned. So, why in the name of holy lake are these pig-headed politicians ruining our sole source of entertainment? They themselves enjoy those erotic hours in hotels, so then why are they against us enjoying seeing their performance. 

now here's a picture of KIM KARDASHIAN to make up(the best i can get among all porn-stars turned actresses)